Tip# 1 - Stop beating yourself up

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I believe one of the greatest steps you can take in your recovery is to stop beating yourself up.  It is easy for those facing anxiety or depression to feel overwhelmed and falling short of society's expectations. You may receive harsh words from family members who just don't understand why you can't "snap out of if."  For the sufferer, these words can really devastate their self-confidence, which usually makes the situation even worse.

As covered in Step 1 of my book, we need to reset our own expectations.  Nobody on earth lives a perfect life. Everyone we meet has flaws whether it be: spending, alcohol, gambling, fidelity, jealousy, fitness, etc. There is no such thing as a perfect life, but we none-the-less beat ourselves up sometimes for falling short of expectations. The fact that you may be suffering from anxiety or depression does not make you any less valuable as a human being and member of society.

The reality is that nobody decides to have anxiety or depression. A sufferer did not pick it out from a menu of choices like a takeout dinner. Generally speaking, it's often a combination of family history, upbringing and beliefs, and life circumstances that tend to steer people into the development of these horrible conditions. Nobody is able to select their family history. Nobody is able to choose their childhood and their instilled beliefs. Nobody is able to control all of life's circumstances. So, the three critical factors in the development of anxiety or depression is/was beyond the suffers control.  Therefore, having someone blame you or a loved one for having trouble is like blaming a fish for swimming in water. It just doesn't make any sense.

Grasping this point is crucial for you and your family circle.  Blame does not achieve recovery. It's time to stop the stigmatism of mental illness in our culture.  There is nothing to be ashamed of.  Please, if you are facing anxiety or depression, get the help that you need. You deserve to get better soon.

As mentioned in the book, I find that daily reminders of these facts are very beneficial for starting the path to recovery. It's hard to start a journey to a better life without first accepting where you are today. More details are covered in the book, but it is my sincere hope that this post helps you start your own recovery from anxiety or depression.


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